Necrotongue

Just as watching a film from the normalization era doesn’t turn me into an avid communist, I don't become a seasoned criminal when watching stories about "heroes" from the underground world, so I can safely say that I really enjoyed the one hundred and forty minutes of gambling/money-laundering with Molly. The running time seemed terrifying, but unlike other similarly long films, it didn't bore me, and the plot was interesting from start to finish. A well deserved five stars.

I did expect the film to be much worse. I thought the creators would twist historical facts to suit their needs, and they did, but unlike in Braveheart, I wasn't flooded by pathos. The main character didn’t usurp all the attention (quite the contrary) and the film was sort of nice to watch. The medieval butchering, gutting and quartering was handled very well, the atmosphere was typically Scottish and grim, and when the front brake was pressed on a galloping horse, things got interesting. I was satisfied.

The film is forty-nine years younger than Battle of Britain, so the poor execution of air battles is something I just cannot ignore. Somebody forgot to tell the CGI team that German planes were equipped with armor, so there was no way a .303 caliber projectile would pierce through them as if they were made of polystyrene. The portrayal of Josef František was accurate, but I have no idea why his "tripping" over a hedge was replaced by the cliffs of Dover. Just for effect? Anyway, I found other goofs as well, but at least I was pleased with the conclusion, which exposed our loyal allies for what they were. The Poles had the advantage of having been betrayed by them only once. The Czechs were sacrificed first to Hitler and later to Stalin. Today, we no longer have anything to fear, because we belong to NATO, where our freedom is secured by the Germans, Italians, French and British, and I obviously trust them unconditionally...

Except for a few details I was pleasantly surprised and very satisfied with the film. Not even the calmer scenes were boring, the acting performances were convincing, and the characters were written in such a believable way that I wished some of them a painful accident (right, Sunrise?).

Spike Lee managed to achieve something which others had failed at. He presented the issue of human rights in the black and white United States in a fun, witty way without unnecessary pathos. Well, there was some in the final documentary footage, but I managed to get over it. John David Washington was excellent, I liked the retro vibe (the afros were perfect), I had fun all along, and it didn't even occur to me that two hours had passed.

I really liked Isabela Moner's performance, despite having said many times that I don't like child actors. Either there's something wrong with me, or the kids are better actors than they used to be. The story seemed to be a bit more far-fetched than the first installment so the logic suffered a little, but it wasn’t bad at all as a whole, I had fun and the two hours just flew by. 4*-.

I guess I’ve seen way too many cooking shows and films about chefs, so I just wasn’t impressed. The only thing that surprised me was that I didn’t find the boy in the role of Carl's son irritating. I would have given it four stars, if the story hadn’t progressed in such a predictable way towards its oh-so-happy ending. Well, at least I enjoyed Sofia Vergara's presence, and Scarlett Johansson was arranged on the couch in a delicate yet delicious way.

Patryk Vega once again improved my afternoon with his standard butchery intertwined with an excellent story. Screenwriters should be made to watch the film to learn how to write a film character who looks and acts realistically. There wasn’t much humor (even though there was some), it was more about a massive dose of suspense and action. Sure, the writing had some shortcomings as usual, but I had so much fun that I don’t feel like nitpicking.

Patryk Vega cracked me up many times by incorporating a purely comic character of a lifetime convict into another one of his typically violent films, and I don’t think I’ll ever forget Marcin's quest for water. Sure, the film was slightly weaker than Vega's other films, but for me, it’s definitely worth four stars.

Patient 0 of Vega's Pitbulls was really entertaining despite a few shortcomings. You could tell it was filmed almost twenty years ago, but it was still a wholesome action film that would put many an American action feature to shame, even though the sequence of some scenes didn’t seem quite right. But I'm just quibbling over details. Overall, I was satisfied and I'm giving it four stars.