John Carter

Forgotten sixth-grade classic, whose excessively lukewarm reception from the audience showed that its time has long passed. And it's damn shame because the hero John Carter, the tough guy Kantos Kan, or my childhood love Dejah Thoris come to life on the big screen in all their beauty. The haphazardly cut time planes scared me a bit in the first few tens of minutes, but once everything settles on Barsoom, the sides are divided and the jumping, slashing, and heroic speeches to the crowds begin, it becomes clear. A successful blockbuster took place between two worlds, transforming the ancient cult into a spectacle full of lines, action, and very well-done moments (the battle cut with a flashback left me with my mouth wide open). We may not get a sequel, but one story for us adventure-seekers will remain. (12.03.2012)

Martian soap opera. Technically brilliant, which was to be expected of Stanton, but problematic in all other respects. John Carter is a return to the "great stories", but it does not update them in any way, and unfortunately, it is not even able to draw on their receptivity and magnetism. As a hero, John is controversial because his "superpowers" are quite doubtfully laid out - for a while he acts awkward, then suddenly he accumulates enemies into neat pyramids. Unfortunately, the enjoyment of similar heroes stems, to a certain extent, from predictability and the resulting sweet expectation of the triumph of the hero over those who have no idea. Carter can jump, but he is unable to excite. Also because Taylor Kitsch is pretty kitschy. And also because the script sinks into weak-minded phrases and useless nonsense, which is crowned by a bit of moralizing. There is even talk about the destructive impact of social differences in a film that cost two hundred million dollars. Weak is not only the chatter, but also the characters as such - harmless derivatives seen many times without any major appeal. I'd love to write that I saw a charming old-school sci-fi. In fact, I saw something much closer to The Phantom Menace than A New Hope - and unlike Lucas, Stanton doesn't have an open treasure trove of working mythology. He goes into debt, he promises, he promises, but he never pays it... Two moments from the whole film remain in my memory: a flashback that pays off nicely and a slap. But Carter and his creators really needed a lot more of them. Three stars out of respect for the technical aspects (and perhaps also out of respect for the courage to resurrect this literary mummy). (06.03.2012)

Two stars for the technical aspect, otherwise, awfully dull. It kept me interested for about 45 minutes, then it lost me. An unlikeable hunk jumps around in Mars surrounded by four-armed green creatures, there’s the expected fateful encounter… and I don’t give a toss… If it was at least funny in any way! But no, just sterile boredom. Millions of dollars wasted and one of the most pointless blockbusters in recent years. (18.05.2012)

A princess (from Mars) and I have been catapulted into a world inhabited by little green men, where they shoot with ray-guns and they have funny-looking dogs. Exactly as I had imagined. John Carter is pure pulp fiction, the type I grew up on (I read two books from the Carter series). Maybe it leans more toward being a fairytale, but the important thing is that the story is nicely predictable, easy to follow and entertaining. It was one of the first of its genre and finds it really difficult to come up with something original, but Stanton did a good job anyway. I didn’t have much trust in Taylor Kitsche before seeing this movie, but he surprised me, as did Lynn Collins and the greenies. The monsters didn’t have that Star Wars stamp on them and they certainly are no substitute but stand alone in their own right. Carter is passable as a piece of history. What a nice wedding it was. (19.03.2012)

John Carter was great. What’s brutal is that there are still some nutjobs in Hollywood who don’t mind drowning a quarter of a billion dollars in a movie. The important thing is that the director used this money to make such a perfect phantasmagoria, which in its own way even makes some sense. Sure, there’s much of objectively crazy nonsense, but in the context of such a fantasy movie it can be forgiven. I haven’t seen anything like this for a long time and I really enjoyed it. Also mainly because I really like such films, but they are terribly rare. The actors were great, the rendition absolutely perfect. What more to add? Maybe just the fact that I would like to see a sequel, but that’s probably quite unlikely. (09.01.2013)