Armageddon

Clichés, clichés and then some more clichés. Add to that a hearty dose of patriotism and boredom, and the result is Armageddon. I don't want to be biased and so: the introduction with meteorites is decent, the training on the NASA base has flair and wit. The rest, on the other hand, is what I say above. (11.05.2003)

This film requires you to turn off your brain and enjoy the skillfully shot action, the good visual effects and the classic pathos. Simple, dumb, but fun. (21.09.2002)

Michael Bay did it!!! I didn't know there was a film that, with its simple pathos, could trump Emmerich's mega-babbling Independence Day. However, Bay scored in a manner so vehement that he broke through the net and beat the spectators in the back of the stands. The first minutes, however, do not suggest any extreme performance, but rather it smoothes everything out into a decent action sphere with good actors and a certain sarcastic perspective; however, at the latest when the President of the USA unpacks his messianic hit and the anonymous mother personally declares to me one of the stupidest sentences in the history of cinema: "He's not a salesman, that's your daddy," Armageddon begins to have the right zest. This is followed by a somewhat weaker passage, where the film goes full-tilt action, everything explodes, is spoiled, corrected... until it turns into slightly boring fireworks. But there's also an excellent ending, where you can finally see some nice compositions with American flags (the actors certainly have them on their shorts) and to hear pearls like "You were the best, Harry!" Bay literally explodes with an orgasm of pathos, cheese and stupidity that knows no bounds. It's an orgasm as powerful as an asteroid explosion, backed up by famously arranged shots and especially (how many times is that now?) an excellent screenplay that has such verbal and stylistic power that it gave me a headache. Don't be angry with me about this waste. It's gourmet waste, the kind of waste I'll probably carry in my heart all the way to my personal Armageddon. I'm just praying something else doesn't beat him. What's that in your pocket, Roland??? (06.11.2005)

I looked at him for so long until I fell in love with him definitively. A controlled dose of absolute patriotism with lots of romantic pathos and catastrophically tuned action scenes. Bay here let loose his megalomaniac destructive imagination for the first time and created the best disaster movie I have ever seen. Willis has never been such an adored hero. (23.07.2007)

This is truly an all-time favorite full of quality humor and characters. I'd be hard pressed to find a better elite. Bruce Willis' charisma is unbeatable, I can't get enough of Ben Affleck, the "Rat" Steve Buscemi made me laugh too much, and M.C. Duncan always adds that much-needed missing touch to a film. Perfect direction, a bombastic script, and I have a big soft spot for the music from this film. 100% for me. More than enough laughs and tears. (13.02.2011)

Camera orgies reaching indescribable dimensions, one of the best soundtracks ever created for a film, captivating action, beautiful Bruckheimer-like filters, sharply contoured image composition and perhaps the most exquisite coloring I have ever seen, excellent dynamic direction, romantic scenes alternating with the most action-packed ones, with at least every other shot carrying an emotional charge that doesn’t leave a moment to catch your breath, great voiceovers, and Bay’s stylish and indispensable low-angle. Bruce Willis delivers a magnificent and restrained performance, brilliantly complemented by the rest of the cast, and the screenwriter deserves praise for the wonderfully structured and diverse characters. For nitpicky film student it will be rubbish, for the ordinary viewer, divine entertainment and literally burning filmmaking, showing what can be done nowadays. As Bay himself once said, “I didn't come to cure cancer, but to entertain people.” It is holy truth. (25.10.2003)

A most American film. On the one hand, this is a good thing, because you are entertained almost non-stop and the incredible influx of "last minute" rescues, enormously explosive heroic moments and frantic editing leaves absolutely no room for proper reflection. But the structure of the STORY is actually terribly ridiculous and annoying, and not only due the pervasive pathos, but more importantly because of the utterly idiotic approach to heroism itself. Everything in the movie sucks from the beginning – smaller asteroids hitting the Earth and a doomsday meteor approaching; there's very little time to train drillers; a few rescuers get arrested just before take-off; everything explodes while refuelling on a Russian station, etc., etc. In doing so, the screenplay wants to constantly heighten the drama and tension, only to reinforce the comedic side from the start and destructively dismantle the fatality that the film tries to communicate with cuts to helpless people praying or even that famous melodramatic ending. There are so many deadlines in the finale that you actually stop caring about them and can only enjoy the whirlwind of crazy catchphrases and the overall grandiose concept, which also sometimes intentionally, but mostly unintentionally, highlights the comedic side. And of course, I must mention perhaps the greatest asset, which is the excellent cast, for who else can better sell us the iconic, flawless tough guy better than the charismatic Willis, who else would entertain us more effectively by goofing around and bouncing on a nuclear warhead than Steve Buscemi, who else could make a full-fledged character out of the routine role of NASA director than Billy Bob Thornton, and what man could excel so well in a supporting, almost lightweight Russian role than the traditionally delectable Peter Stormare? Armageddon is enormous bollocks, but, as unconvincing as it sounds, it's honest and cinematically entertaining bollocks. Saving the world is a joke. 65% (15.06.2012)

A star for the special effects and the cast, the rest is drowned in bathos and patriotic clichés. (27.06.2016)

I've been avoiding that movie for a really long time, but I can't deny that it's action-packed enough, excellently executed in terms of special effects, mostly has great sets, and it's an awesome tearjerker. You can forgive him here and there for those Bay-esque nonsense things that he puts in every movie, just like the incredibly far-fetched plot that seems terribly believable. But it's true that a crisis situation calls for crazy solutions. And this is truly crazy. Great actors, led by Bruce Willis. (20.10.2014)